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The companies behind these make millions of dollars promising men longer and better sexual performance. And some men like the anonymity of such a service because they are often too embarrassed to see their GP or visit a sex therapist. Longer lasting sex: Is it really what women want?
Credit: Yuri Arcurs. Mostly the company "doctors" don't see the men in their practice; they just talk to them over the phone and prescribe expensive treatments, such as nasal sprays or oral strips, without a proper medical consultation. The fact that many GPs are also not comfortable talking about sex with their patients, doesn't help, and explains why these companies are popular. Unfortunately we are bombarded with society's ideals of male sexuality in the media, which create unrealistic expectations of how a man should look and perform in the bedroom.
These advertisements prey on the insecurities of men who often have no sexual dysfunction at all. Inexperienced young men who have received most of their sex education by looking at porn are most affected. They see professional actors with porn-star bodies perform unrealistic fantasy sex - with a rock-hard penis - lasting for a very long time.
It's no surprise that for some men all these expectations can damage their confidence. One of my clients was a year-old young man who met a girl he really liked and wanted to make sure he would be a good lover. He'd had some flings with girls before, but he was worried that he only lasted for about 10 minutes.
When I explained that the "average" ejaculation time is between three and seven minutes, he could hardly believe it. He thought it should be at least 20 minutes because some of his "mates" told him they could last for half an hour or more! He left my office with a confident big smile on his face. Premature ejaculation PE is a condition that about 30 per cent of the male population suffer from, at some time in their lives. Often it's not physical but psychological - inexperience and worry can cause performance anxiety.
When a man anticipates problems about his performance, it can become a self-fulfilling fear and it's not unusual to also start losing erections. However, there are men who always ejaculate within two minutes and would like to last longer. The earliest treatment for PE was the start-stop method a way of learning ejaculatory control that still remains popular. A study presented at the European Association of Urology Congress in Stockholm, last year, showed that pelvic floor exercises can help improve ejaculation time. This is a helpful link to the Mayo Clinic's Kegel exercises sheet.
Many men develop PE as a result of constantly hurrying to finish masturbation when they were young, often because of guilt or shame; or worry about lack of privacy in case parents, siblings or room-mates "caught them in the act". Masturbation should be enjoyed and be a source of pleasure, so change your masturbation pattern and find the privacy you need to enjoy your time alone.
Disappointing or bad experiences with former partners can also cause anxiety and will make it difficult to relax.
Another treatment option involves applying a desensitising cream or a topical lidocaine-based spray, such as the US Food and Drug Administration approved Promescent, which has few side effects. The spray lotion is rubbed into the skin of the penis until it is completely absorbed, about 10 minutes before sexual activity.
For men who use condoms Durex has the Performa and Extended Pleasure condoms, which contain lubricant with the anaesthetic Benzocaine. Last year a new medication entered the market called Priligy, which is taken 30 minutes before intercourse and lasts for up to four hours. Some doctors treat PE with a daily dose of selective serotonin-reuptake inhibitors SSRIs the most commonly prescribed antidepressants, used to treat clinical depression. Serotonin has a depressant effect on sexual response, which means one side-effect is delayed orgasm.
One of my clients tried it for six months and was disappointed, he lasted a bit longer sexually but suffered badly from several side-effects of the drug. Anyway, why prescribe a perfectly healthy young man anti-depressants, when there are so many other treatments available? In my experience, very few women care much about the length of the sex session. Instead, they want more focus on foreplay, connection, pleasure, intimacy and emotional closeness.
Sometimes intercourse can become painful when it takes too long. Many perfectly normal women don't produce much vaginal lubrication, so it's important to always use enough lubricant. Women need more time to get aroused; they like their men to give good oral sex and know where to find and how to stimulate the clitoris to give them an orgasm.
Do women really want men to last longer in bed?
Please try again later. The Sydney Morning Herald.
By Matty Silver August 3, — 3. Save Log inregister or subscribe to save articles for later. Normal text size Larger text size Very large text size. So what DO women want? So if anything should last longer, it should be foreplay! Matty Silver.I need a woman that can last more than 20 minutes
email: [email protected] - phone:(957) 280-5004 x 9663
What to know about female multiple orgasms