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Register here. She became so caught up in her virtual world that she sometimes carried on texting them in the evenings, while her husband sat opposite her at dinner, pouring her a glass of wine, oblivious to what she was doing. Lucy Dent is a pseudonym. The author, who wishes to remain anonymous, agreed to this interview on the understanding that it would be done on the telephone with her publicist at her side.
I would not be allowed to mention where she lives and only that she works as an associate producer for a TV broadcast company. Dent says she wrote it after posting a shorter version of what happened on a relationship forum after her marriage broke down and because her therapist suggested writing might help her recovery. It is a modern condition, a 21st-century malaise. Everyone is at it. Look around you right now. One attraction is the freedom it offers. It began after Dent was made redundant and the work on the new house she and her husband had recently bought had been finished.
Having decided not to have children and seemingly without any serious hobbies or interests to sustain her intellectually, a chasm of boredom opened up. Andrew started drinking more. He moved into the spare bedroom. Their sex life stopped and Dent started to withdraw emotionally as well as physically. Sometimes they would go to the races — his passion, not hers — and on one occasion she met a group of married women who called themselves the racing widows.
Claiming that they colluded with their husbands in serial infidelities on both sides, they told her how they occasionally enjoyed the services of male escorts. To her horror, this was met with a stream of outraged responses from angry women calling her a disgrace to her gender, taking her womb for granted and so forth. She ed out fast and went on to surf porn, the world of webcams and sex chat rooms. I rather fancy a wank. But then setting is everything.
To read that this stranger was on the point of masturbating while writing to me lit me up inside. That was just the beginning. Withdrawing more and more into the virtual world, she became hooked into an endless cycle of sexting, her sex drive soaring but only when she was alone. He moved out and she started to see a therapist specialising in online addictions.
After several weeks, he opened her up to the idea of confronting her own difficult childhood in an attempt to help her understand her intimacy issues. Dent was not yet two. Later her mother would make her kneel on her bare knees on the front door mat as a punishment or beat her with a wooden spoon.
Clearly she is still struggling with this, and she says her mother would be hurt and angry if she knew about the book. My mother lives in a parallel universe. Dent has put her online life behind her, wanting to disassociate herself from it in the way ex-addicts do.
Yet I sense a void even now and wonder if she regrets her decision not to have children. Avoiding the whole thing was a way of being able to avoid looking at my own childhood. ES Money. The Escapist. The Reveller. The Optimist. ES Best. ES Mag. Follow us:. Password Please enter a valid password. Submit Submit. A t the height of her addiction to cyber-sex, Lucy Dent would spend entire nights awake on her laptop, chatting to a string of anonymous online lovers, only switching her computer off as the sun rose and her husband Andrew was waking up.Cybersex chat rooms and sat nights
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